This exercise was a big ask. My friend has been suffering with some mental health problems over the past couple of years since the pandemic and lockdowns. Over time I’ve seen her at her most vulnerable and distressed. She is a very proud and self-conscious of her appearance. In order to facilitate the task, she agreed to a photo of her to evidence a likeness, however I must remove this from the blog once my tutor has seen it. The photo was taken during our talk and sitting.
Prior to the task I decided that charcoal would be my medium again and based on some of Kentridge’s work. (see research section).
I began to undertake a little practice piece in A5 size just to explore the dark and light shapes and the flatter surface. I wanted to use a mountboard rather than watercolour paper as this would give a smoother effect for the skin tones. Working on a smaller scale meant that I couldn’t use fingers to blend so although I’d never used one before I used a blending tool or stump maybe. Not sure what it’s called. I was relieved when it worked well. My very quick sketch is below.
This could be anybody, but it allowed me to get the feel of the charcoal on a smoother surface and to get some contrasting dark and light shapes of a face. I also wanted to practice the hand and I erased it a couple of times which was easy on the smooth surface.
As I begin this exercise it is important that I am very sensitive and not too intrusive with the questions. I already know a lot of the answers, so I must tread carefully. My friend had a great career, was highly regarded and in the past held a very responsible senior position in the care sector. Sadly, the years since retirement haven’t been kind. Deteriorating physical health, mobility problems and even simple motor skills are a challenge. Over time the battle to accept these issues has taken it’s toll on her mental health with very deep depression at times, some cognitive issues exacerbated by poor hearing. As I speak to her and begin my task. I reassure her that I won’t probe about the issues. It would be so easy to have her overwhelmed and in floods of tears. Her emotions are very raw. We both know however that she experiences often feelings of despair, failure, uselessness, loss of what she once was and had. These feelings are all present and bubbling under the surface. Today I begin with one or two photos. She looks tired and a little on edge. She doesn’t really ever pose and hates her photo being taken. She is usually wearing make-up and takes great pride in her appearance. I take three photos. She looks at them all and reluctantly agrees to one. I thank her and acknowledge how difficult this must be, but she agrees she wants to help me. “As long as you only use the photo I choose, and you must take it off the blog once your tutor has seen it.” I agree. She speaks about how awful she looks, and she states how tired she is and mentions the bags under her eyes. She knows I am going to try to capture some of the raw emotions in the photo and those that I know she is experiencing.
I decide to work in the charcoal again and this time a smooth surface that is card and it is already toned in a light grey. As soon as I finished talking with my friend, I went into the studio to complete the work. I have a photo A4 size, and it would be easy to trace it, but I don’t want to do that. I must improve my drawing and work from observation. I can’t keep stopping for photos but what I thought was my final image is below.
Once the overall shape of the head and the hand is in place I start to work on the dark and light planes as I see them in her face. I block in and keep working the lights and darks, rubbing in with fingers and my newfound blender. I want the hair to blend into the background on the left-hand side. I need to rework the shape of the face a little and keep adjusting mouth and nose. I place the expressive marks in her forehead and the contours of the hand. I then try some highlights with a white conte crayon. This works well in places. I use the mechanical eraser and it keeps serving me well. My process is to just observe as best I can and to work quickly. This is a must to promote better accuracy. For some lines I use finer charcoal and for other areas I use the stuck flat and press hard. I am really enjoying charcoal despite how messy it is.
I’m trying to be sensitive to her wishes by keeping the real image smaller. There are some elements I can see that I could still rework such as the tilt of her head. What I do feel I’ve captured is the emotion and almost fear in her face. I’m not sure about the likeness…the jury’s out on this maybe.
Drawing 2 Interpreting the environment 